"Oh no!" I yelled, throwing Arthur his Excalibur. "Look out!"
Arthur plucked the fabled blade from the air and smote the knight asunder, cleft from groin to shoulder.
"Thanks, Sir Hotbodric," said Arthur, tipping his Raybans down his nose to give me that legendary wink. "I never saw him coming."
"We’re not done yet," I said, pointing to our feet. "We’ve got to help these baby sea turtles reach the shore before being eaten by sea birds!"
"Damnable sea birds!" Arthur yelled at the gathering swarm above, shaking his chainmailed fist. "If just one baby turtle doesn’t make it to adulthood, I swear upon the bones of my father Sir Uther Pentdragon that-"
"-No time," I interjected. "They’re hatching!"
We ran along the shoreline slashing at birds above and ushering turtles below, barking words of encouragement to our vulnerable charges and curses to their winged foes. Many birds were cleaved that day; many pillows-worth of down littered the sand until not one turtle was left unhatched and escorted safely to the bosom of the sea by this humble knight and his most gracious liege.
The setting sun baked us in our chainmail and armor. Thusly we stripped ourselves to the bare flesh. Our attentions strayed elsewhere, to merrymaking. We splashed in the salty brine and named the oncoming waves silly names and built sand castles until our arms could no longer bare the weight of the wet sand. Camelot, we called our castle.
"I hope to have a castle all my own some day, Sir Hotbodric," Said Arthur. "A castle for two dudes, just you and me."
He laid his head down on my chest and traced circles around my navel. I wrapped my arms around his heaving freckled shoulders and told him that someday our dream would come true.